I’ve been getting a lot of guilt from my mother about leaving New Jersey. “California is so far; what if something happened to me or your father?” etc…
I’ve been feeling pretty bummed about this. PPG suggested that I directly ask her for her support. So I asked, “I really would like to get your support on this, it’s something I feel that I have to do and I would like you to be happy and enthusiastic for me.”
“I do support you, but I don’t have to like it. I can’t stand how far away you’re going. Do you have to go so far?”
“Part of what supporting me means is not following every positive comment with a negative one. And no matter where I go, I’ll be near an airport. How is that different from you going to Florida for 6 months?”
“But California is farther away than Florida. Why don’t you go to Nashville. It’s so nice there. If you go away, I’ll never see you.” etc etc etc.
This circular crap went around for about 30 minutes. Every positive comment from me tempered by poorly masqueraded guilt-ridden pleading.
I’m glad we had the conversation. She gave me pretty much every argument she had in her arsenal. I can now tune them all out. :-(