Archive for the ‘General’ Category.

Smokey Bay Area

Clean air tip: If the air is smokey, go to the hardware store and get a really good furnace filter. Your home will feel like a bubble of good air in an otherwise smokey mess. (The bay area forest fires are getting kinda crazy. We’re safe but the smoke is everywhere)

Removing the hazy film from your car windshield

I figured out how to get that awful film off the inside of my windshield! You know the stuff. Every window cleaner seems to work but then when it gets just a little foggy, the streaks show up, obscuring your view and looking all terrible. It’s simple: Use a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser on the window!
It’s not expensive, it’s easy. It works. Problem solved!

Full instructions:

  1. Get a magic eraser pad, any brand will do
  2. Get the pad wet
  3. Rub gently back and forth, up and down on the windshield. Rub gently, it’s an abrasive!
  4. Clean the windshield with your favorite glass cleaner
  5. Triumph in joy!
Credit where it’s due: it was this video from ChrisFix on Youtube that showed me.

Cricket Wireless and Google Voice

If you use Cricket Wireless, you may have found, like me, that Cricket Visual Voicemail sucks. Here’s how to change to using Google Voice voicemail.

Step 1: Get free a Google Voice account with a new phone number

Step 2: Set up conditional call forwarding like so:

**004*[your google voice number]#

Step 3: Have someone call you and the call should be answered by your google voice. Rejoice in the non-suckyness!

You can disable this forwarding with #004#

You can read more about conditional call forwarding for GSM phones here

 

 

Why do I say the Cricket Visual Voicemail Android app sucks?

  • I have to push most buttons twice for it to work (sounds crazy? it is!)
  • When I start playing a voicemail, the first 3 seconds play and then it stops. Hitting play (twice) restarts it as long as I’ve waited the magically determined amount of time. It’s crazymaking like having a big piece of lint under one of my keys!
  • It often doesn’t transcribe my messages
  • I’ve had these exact same problems for 3 years and 2 phones

 

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Jokes

What do you do with a sick boat?
Take it to the doc!

A neutron walks into a bar and asks “how much for a beer?” The bartender says, “for you? no charge.”

Two hydrogen atoms are walking down the street. One stops, looks in his pockets and says, “Wait, I think I lost an electron!” The other says, “Are you sure?” The first says, “Yes! I’m positive!”

A helium atom walks into a bar and the bartender says ” we don’t serve noble gases here.”
No reaction.

Did you hear about the uranium atoms that went to the anti war rally. They got bored and split.

Two uranium atoms are at an anti-war rally. From the other side of the way an atom throws a proton and hits one of them right in the head. The other says, “Don’t let his negativity effect you!”

What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Gummi-bear!

A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff
[Ba dum bum, tssss!]

What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
Pumpkin pi!

What do you call a fish with no eye?
fffsssshhhhh

Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil?
BECAUSE IT’S POINTLESS!

What do vegan zombies love more than anything in the whole world?
Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaains!

What did one snowman say to the other?
Do you smell carrots?

what do you do with epileptic lettuce?
You make a seizure salad!

There’s two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says
‘You man the guns, I’ll drive’

A man didn’t like his haircut, but it started to grow on him.

Guy walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under arm. Says to the bartender: “I’ll take a beer, and one for the road.”

Why did the cowboy adopt a weiner dog?
He wanted to get a long little doggy!

How does the man in the moon cut his hair?
ECLIPSE IT!

Where does George Washington keep his armies?
In his sleevies!

Why does a moon rock taste better than an earth rock?
Because its a little meteor!

Help Me Find a Bed

Please help me. I sleep on my side. Most nights my hip sinks into my bed, pulling my back out of wack and giving me a backache. Nearly every bed I’ve had in my life has started to sag in the hip area after a few months. Do you know of a bed that doesn’t have this problem? Please don’t write saying “I’ve never had a problem with xxx bed.” Most people haven’t had a problem with ANY bed. I’d like to hear “I had a problem with several beds but found THIS bed to be better…”

A partial lineup of the beds I’ve killed:

  • Actually, the waterbed I had in high school (thanks mom & dad & 1980’s!) didn’t have a problem.
  • I killed a bunch of beds through college and after but I can’t recall the deets.
  • 1999: I think it was a new Sealy Posturpedic. I killed it
  • 2003: Bed in NJ. When I moved in 2005, it was starting to feel pretty bad
  • 2005: I slept on a portable Aerobed for 6 months. It was awesome.
  • 2005: store model Macys bed. I lay on it in the store for an hour and loved it. I had it at home for 2 weeks and my butt sank so low, it felt like I was in a lounge chair. Returned.
  • 2006: new Ikea Sultan queen bed. I had to throw it away after 3 years
  • 2009: another new Ikea Sultan queen bed. I killed it.
  • 2012: Megan’s queen size bed for 3 years. I killed it.
  • 2015: Nest Alexander Signature Select – Medium, King size. After 1.5 years, to keep my back sanity, I have a 2″ mattress topper, and I put a towel between the mattress topper and mattress (over the course of 2 months I go from 0-3 layers of towel to give increasing support) and every 2-3 months I have to rotate the bed 90 degrees. Originally I had to rotate it every 4-6 months.