Archive for the ‘Distractions’ Category.

All We Are Saying Is Give Sea Kittens a Chance

from our wing nut friends at PETA

Top 10 Sexy Lines From Star Wars

This has been sitting in a dark corner of my computer for years. I just came across it again and…. well, it’s completely immature but I love it. Without further adieu: The Top 10 sexy lines from Star Wars

10) “Get in there you big furry oaf, I don’t care what you smell!”
9) “Luke, at that speed do you think you’ll be able to pull out in
8) “Put that thing away before you get us all killed.”
7) “You’ve got something jammed in here real good.”
6) “Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?”
5) “You came in that thing? You’re braver than I thought.”
4) “Sorry about the mess…”
3) “Look at the size of that thing!”
2) “Curse my metal body, I wasn’t fast enough!”
1) “She may not look like much, but she’s got it where it counts, kid.”


10) “I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me.”
9) “Size matters not. Judge me by my size, do you?”
8) “There’s an awful lot of moisture in here.”
7) “But now we must eat. Come, good food, come…”
6) “That’s okay, I’d like to keep it on manual control for a while.”
5) Hurry up, golden-rod…”
4) “I must’ve hit it pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up
like that, huh kid?”
3) “Possible he came in through the south entrance.”
2) “And I thought they smelled bad on the outside!”
1) “Control, control! You must learn control!”


10) “Hey, point that thing someplace else.”
9) “I look forward to completing your training. In time you will call
me master.”
8) “You’re a jittery little thing, aren’t you?”
7) “I never knew I had it in me.”
6) “Someone must’ve told them about my little maneuver at the battle of
5) “There is good in him, I’ve felt it.”
4) “I assure you, Lord Vader, my men are working as fast as they can.”
“Perhaps I can find new ways to motivate them.”
3) “Grab me, Chewie. I’m slipping – hold on. Grab it, almost… you
almost got it. Gently now, all right, easy, easy, hold me, Chewie.
2) “Hey, Luke, thanks for coming after me – now I owe you one.”
1) “Back door, huh? Good idea!”

Friendship – None of that Sissy Shit

Are you tired of those sissy ‘friendship’ poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?  Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.  You will see no cute little smiley faces on this, just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.

  1. When you are sad ~ I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
  2. When you are blue ~ I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
  3. When you smile ~ I will know you are thinking of something that I would probably want to be involved in.
  4. When you are scared ~ I will rag on you about it every chance I get until you’re NOT.
  5. When you are worried ~ I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
  6. When you are confused ~ I will try to use only little words.
  7. When you are sick ~ Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don’t want whatever you have.
  8. When you fall ~ I will laugh at your clumsy ass, but I’ll help you up.
  9. This is my oath ….. I pledge it to the end. ‘Why?’ you may ask ~ because you are my friend.

Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you  can feel the true warmth.

New Comment Spam Policy

(mouseover: And what about all the people who won’t be able to join the community because they’re terrible at making helpful and constructive co– … oh.  )

I get my news from The Daily Show and my blogging advice from XKCD.

Unconstructive comments will be marked as spam.

What I’m Not Looking for in a Partner

Someecards knows exactly what I don’t want.

Gravy is not Replenished Once Depleted

Advice for life as seen in the breakfast room of the West Western hotel in Dallas Oregon. This sign hangs over a crock pot full of breakfast gravy. Brent and I, while travelling for earthmine, noticed that this sign had a secret special significance.

Gravy is not
once depleted.
It is served as a
first come first
served basis.

Caution: Gravy
is hot!

Are You Going to Burning Man This Year?

Emo Phillips: The Animal Square Dance

Ok, I know I haven’t posted anything of my own creation on the blog in a while… but this makes me so happy!

Burning Man 2010 Resource Guide – Part 1

Every year Burning Man puts out a guide for buying supplies and such. This year’s list is pretty darn huge. So I’ve split it into 2 parts. Here you go!

Part 1

Table of Contents

Playa Preparation Events
Lights and Electronics
Miscellaneous BRC Gear
Playa Wear
Playa Preparation Events

Prepare for the Playa

Continue reading ‘Burning Man 2010 Resource Guide – Part 1’ »

Misplaced Posters

I went to New York a week ago and saw this poster in Baggage Claim at JFK.
Umm, if the bag made it this far, what do you think the odds are of it being a bomb?