Here’s a funny for you. If you don’t like funnies, don’t click on the “More” thingie<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Political Science for Dummies<\/span><\/font> <\/span><\/font><\/p>\n \n DEMOCRATIC<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n <\/span><\/font><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. REPUBLICAN <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. SOCIALIST <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. COMMUNIST <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. AMERICAN CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. FRENCH CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. JAPANESE CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. GERMAN CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. ITALIAN CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows but you don’t know where they are. RUSSIAN CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. TALIBAN CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have all the cows in Afghanistan , which are two. AL-QAIDA CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two cows. POLISH CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have two bulls. BELGIAN CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have one cow. FLORIDA CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have a black cow and a brown cow. CALIFORNIA CORPORATION <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n You have millions of cows. Here’s a funny for you. If you don’t like funnies, don’t click on the “More” thingie<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1234","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-distractions"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lee.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1234","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lee.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lee.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lee.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lee.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1234"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lee.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1234\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lee.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1234"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lee.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1234"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lee.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1234"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\n
\n \n \n
\nYour neighbor has none.
\nYou feel guilty for being successful.
\nBarbara Streisand sings for you.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nYour neighbor has none.
\nSo? <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nThe government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
\nYou form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nThe government seizes both and provides you with milk.
\nYou wait in line for hours to get it.
\nIt is expensive and sour.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nYou sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows. <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nUnder the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain. <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nYou sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
\nYou force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
\nYour stock goes up. <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nYou go on strike because you want three cows.
\nYou go to lunch and drink wine.
\nLife is good.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nYou redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
\nThey learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
\nMost are at the top of their class at cow school.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nYou engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
\nUnfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nWhile ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
\nYou break for lunch.
\nLife is good.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nYou have some vodka.
\nYou count them and learn you have five cows.
\nYou have some more vodka.
\nYou count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
\nThe Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nYou don’t milk them because you cannot touch any creature’s private parts.
\nYou get a $40 million grant from the US government to find alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nThey go into hiding.
\nThey send radio tapes of their mooing. <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nEmployees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them. <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nThe cow is schizophrenic.
\nSometimes the cow thinks he’s French, other times he’s Flemish.
\nThe Flemish cow won’t share with the French cow.
\nThe French cow wants control of the Flemish cow’s milk.
\nThe cow asks permission to be cut in half.
\nThe cow dies happy.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nEveryone votes for the best looking one.
\nSome of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally vote for the black one.
\nSome people vote for both.
\nSome people vote for neither.
\nSome people can’t figure out how to vote at all.
\nFinally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you think is the best-looking cow. <\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n \n \n
\nThey make real California cheese.
\nOnly five speak English.
\nMost are illegals.
\nArnold likes the ones with the big udders.<\/span><\/font><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"